It's always something...

"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans." - John Lennon

Well, let's see...minor things first. I'm doing well with the bionics. A bit of the tremor has returned, so I suspect the brain is less swollen. I'll make an appointment in about a month to return to Mayo for another programming session. I am able to write a sentence or two, and sign my name with legible handwriting that looks a lot like my writing from 25 years or so ago. I can apply toothpaste to brush, stab food with a fork, pick up a pen and other tasks that were well nigh impossible a month ago. Small victories. Yay.

Scott is graduating from high school in a month. Doesn't seem possible. He and girlfriend Marissa attended prom Saturday night. Yay.



On a sour note, I had to take Bobbi to the emergency room today with chest pains. It's a heart problem, but there doesn't seem to be any damage. They're keeping her tonight, and a cardiologist will check her tomorrow. She's feeling fine, but we mustn't take chances.

A lighter addendum to above sour note: This evening, while Scott, Marissa, Marge (the fabled one), Becky, Tracy and I were all in Bobbi's room, an apparent roof leak caused a paint "pimple" in the ceiling near the door. The blister-like thing split, and like an inverted volcano, spilled about a half-gallon of water onto the floor. Vigorous mopping by nurses/aides/techs. Hospital staffers from everywhere appeared to view the carnage. Another paint pimple was visible, and some enterprising member of the janitorial staff put a very large trash can beneath it to catch the jetsam when this one, too, burst. But we were proactive. Using my McGyver Autograph Model Swiss Army knife, Scott pierced the darn thing, spilling its contents and eliminating the tortuous wait for the inevitable. The whole affair was really pretty funny. Maybe you had to be there.

At any rate, Bobbi should be coming home tomorrow. My sister and brother-in-law are visiting from Maryland this week. Yay.

Thanks for your interest,
Tom

The Six Million Dollar Man

Now, if I just LOOKED like Lee Majors...

Well, we cheated death yet again and made it home. And I AM bionic. Thursday morning, the zapper was programmed and I was introduced to my neat-o multi-function control unit. I was given (limited) programming access; the rig is now under my (limited) control. I can change the voltage. BWAA-HA-HAH!

The programming took about two hours. When I switch the system on ("Set phasers to stun..."), there is the oddest quasi-electrical buzzing in my cheeks, neck and arms; a feeling that defies description. The sensation subsides in a few seconds, but it's really pretty cool. If one watches as the unit ramps up to full power (warp factor nine), it's very easy to see the tremor disappear. It's quite the show. I'm thinking of doing birthday parties and bar mitzvahs.

A visit with Dr. Lee was next on the agenda. He's not only a kick-ass brain surgeon, but a joyous guy who's extremely easy to talk to. He absolutely LOVES what he does; he's definitely living in his sweet spot. He ran and found a programming unit and we played "electro-joy" some more. Great fun. While he scurried about in search of the programmer, we spoke with a couple of residents he's training and they consider themselves fortunate to be under Dr. Lee's tutelege. Even the most jaded staff people have nothing but good things to say about his people skills as well as his surgical ones. I'm pretty damn lucky.

I'll have to go back for more program tweaking in a couple months, as the brain is still somewhat swollen. This, too, is normal. I'm told that although right now my right hand is rock steady and my left nearly so, we can do even better. It's difficult to impart what an immediate change this makes in the way I perform so many tasks. I have to relearn a number of things.

I have already discovered that my hands refusing to go where I aim them has not been the only roadblock to my playing the guitar and banjo; I am HORRIBLY out of practice. For a long time, it's been pointless to try. Anyhow, no chops. I'll get 'em back, though.

I get to resume an unrestricted activities schedule this week. I'm looking forward to Tai Chi and perhaps golf, if it doesn't snow. The low tonight is forecast to be 20 degrees. It's April. It's Southwest Missouri. That's just not right.

DANG it! I forgot to obtain a set of the photos taken during the surgery; I'll have to work on that next week as well. Meanwhile, I'll keep relearning stuff, and I'll let you know how's tricks in a few days.

Thanks for your interest,
Tom

Back to the Future

OK, I dumped the whole "Day XX" thing; didn't make much sense anymore, anyway.

We're headed back to Rochester again tomorrow morning so that the staff can program my zapper - uh, the neurostimulator. I've heard all manner of suggestions for special add-on features to my bionic gear; some quite amusing. At least ONE of my friends doesn't see the humor in a remote control Tom. Upon reflection, I suppose I am mostly serious about it all; it's important to me.

I know I'm looking forward to the programming process. As the brain has healed, there has been some regression of the effects on the tremor; I'm fairly shaky just now. Dr. Lee predicted the phenomenon, though, and assures me that we'll still eliminate it with the programming of the unit. As he told me during and shortly after the surgery, "We got 'em right where we want 'em" (referring to the brain implants). I'm still going to lobby hard for programming access myself.

So, 20 or so hours of driving sandwiched around a couple hours of establishing and fine-tuning the stimulus parameters. I reiterate - a small price to pay! And with any luck, this will be the last trip for awhile. I can't wait to (try to) play the guitar.

I'll be back with notes on what happened in a day or two; so stay tuned - don't touch that dial! Dial?! Geez, does that age me or what?

Thanks for your interest,
Tom